YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
