Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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