Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
