Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize