I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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