The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
