i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
