O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
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