If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
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