I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
