do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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