I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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