I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
