seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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