At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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