i barfeds in our rink
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
i think i just naturally attract stoners
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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