Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Randomize
