Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize