I want to stick my p in your. b.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
