It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
