wat bout pragnant strippers??
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize