Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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