Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
