the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
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