So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Randomize
