are you still at the devil's house?
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
