Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I puked a lego.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
he thought i was a dude.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
