I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize