hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
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