Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
