i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
