You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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