found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
