my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize