i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
