I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
