"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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