He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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