Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
