is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
