i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
You need a sexual gate keeper
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
