yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
