i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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