proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
