Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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