is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
