...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
