He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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