I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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