i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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