I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
