We named our party play list daddy issues
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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